So... It took me a little while to get everything squared away.
But Quick! Before it's too Late! Go enter her Contest...
The Story of the Zombie Kitten
Once upon a time there was a Zombie Kitten. He looked like a regular Zombie Kitten. He had decaying, grey skin, and pale white eyes, and a little pink tongue, and sharp little teeth. However, he was not an entirely normal Zombie Kitten. This Kitten, named Zomg, liked brains like all the other Zombie Kittens, but he also liked jam. All kinds of jams. He liked blueberry jams, orange jams, strawberry jams, brain jam... He even adored a good marmalade.
Everyone made fun of Zomg. They said he wasn't really a Zombie Kitten at all, that he was just pretending. Feeling awfully sad, Zomg lyrched dejectedly away from the group of Zombie Kittens who were calling him nasty names, and he found a good willow tree to hide under. He thought it appropriate, because Willow Trees represented crying, and that was exactly what he felt like. Crying. He didn't want to be called a wuss, or an Un-Real Zombie Kitten, so he sucked in a breath, and was just about to strut proudly back out of the hanging branches of the willow tree when...
"Oh my pleasant tailfeathers, I thought you were a flying monkey."
Something fell out of the tree, landed in front of Zomg, and started talking straight at him. It was a strange looking kitten, all white, faintly sparkling, and with fang-like teeth.
Zomg tilted his head. "You don't have tailfeathers, and how in every grave did you think I was a flying monkey? I don't have wings and..." Then Zomg gasped. *GASP!* "You are a Vampire Kitten!" Zomg screamed.
"Well, of course," said the Vampire Kitten. "My name's Edwardio III, and sometimes people think I'm a frog, because I like to paint myself green late at night. What's your name?"
"Zomg," Zomg said quietly, not sure what to think of such a strange creature. But Zomg was an honest creature, so he decided to sputter out: "I like jam!" He figured that painting oneself green was much less odd than liking jam.
"I like jam too!" squealed Edwardio III. "We shall be best friends!"
And so they were. Edwardio III would paint himself green while Zomg would try a new jam, and they had the most lovely time together. The End.
(Weird. Nobody died 0_O)