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Tuesday, May 4, 2010

P is for Publishers Picking Pumpkins

You guessed it! It's the long awaited for post where I will convince you that a pumpkin patch is like publishing. I would like to dedicate this blog to Rebecca (my sis) because I honestly had no idea HOW publishing was like a pumpkin patch, and she helped me see the multiple possibilities.


First: The Pumpkins.

Pumpkins represent us, the writers. From afar all pumpkins look the same, but we are all very different. Some of us are tall, thin pumpkins. Some of us are cute and small. Some of us have twiny things coming from the top of our heads, and we're not sure why.

Some glow when you turn the lights off??!!

Some pumpkins are better than others. Ah! Did I really just say this?! Yes. Tolkien was better than a whole lot of writers that are floating around nowadays. I won't say specifically who, because that is one step too mean. But it's true. One day you will find a writer who is better than you. You will feel jealous and mad. Get over it. You are still a pumpkin, and you are needed in the pumpkin patch of life.

Second: The Pumpkin Pickers.

Pic Owned By CeeCeeDotCa
Hm? Which pumpkin shall I pick? Mwahahah >:)

These are the agents. They have to hunt through pumpkins to find the one that is just right for them. One pumpkin picker may like giant fat pumpkins, other pumpkin pickers will be looking for quirky looking ones. Or pumkins who wear glasses and like lollipops.


This one likes gardening

Then the Pumpkin Pickers go to the market with their little Pumpkins and try to sell them.

Third: The Pumpkin Purchasers

Check HERE for an article on Punkins
The haggling commences

These are the publishers, editors, and the like. They go to the Pumpkin Pickers and look through their Pumpkins to see which ones they like best. Sometimes there's a match and SOLD! everyone's happy. A lot of the times though, nothing is sold and the Pumpkin has to sit around until the next day comes, and then the next, and then the next. Sometimes the Pumpkin Picker has to give up and give their Pumpkin to another Pumpkin Picker. And sometimes, the Pumpkin gets sent right back to the Pumpkin Patch.

Fourth: Pretending to be Pumpkin Pickers

These are the fake agents. They pretend to be Pumpkin Pickers, but really they're just trying to cut open Pumpkins, scoop out all their insides, and leave them for dead.

Punkin Guts

Do not trust these Pretenders. Learn to know who the real Pumpkin Pickers are.

Fifth: Gourds.

They don't even start with the letter "p" so you know something's up. And this is where I insult people, because I have nothing against insulting people, if it gets them to think. Plus, I don't think this applies to any of you, so calm down and lighten up.

Click HERE for the original article
They LOOK cute, but beware

There are some gourds among the pumpkins that are not pumpkins. They look like pumpkins, they smell like pumpkins, but they aren't. And sometimes these gourds get picked and sold and taken by Pumpkin Purchasers. This can make Pumpkins sad. Sometimes, a Pumpkin will go and to the baker and let himself/herself be turned into Pumpkin Pie. What most people don't know, is that there is a little cemetery behind the Baker's shop of dead Pumpkins who gave up.

Waiting to be turned into pies

Okay. That sounds more sadistic than I thought it would. But the point is as a Pumpkin we should be proud of our Pumkiny self. We are needed in the Pumpkin Patch of life. Keep yourself all shined up in case a Pumpkin Picker comes to look at you.

Be a Pumpkin. Be a darn good Pumpkin.


Jen said...

This was adorable! I love pumpkins and I think it's amazing all the pictures you have taken!

AchingHope said...

Thanks! I love pumpkins too :)

Laura Marcella said...

When I was 1, I wore a pumpkin costume for Halloween. I suppose that was foreshadowing my future. If only I knew then what I was getting myself into!

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

Yeah! The Pumpkin Patch story! The one I wrote and let you take credit for! Not really, but now everyone will always wonder....

Falen said...

Now i want Halloween!
And pumpkin seeds. YUM!

Joan Crawford said...

I am Pumpkin-Crazy. I know it wasn't the point of the tale but I love all the pumpkin pics and I want a house in the middle of a pumpkin patch. In Vermont. Or Norway. Do they have pumpkin patches in Norway I wonder?

Be a Pumpkin. Be a darn good Pumpkin.

Heh! I read this in that very serious male narrator voice they use for all dramatic movies.

ElvishVampireHobbit94 said...

I shall proudly be a pumkin! After all, there is someone I would feel like I was letting down after she got me started. I'm just happy she is in no way a gourd. =]

AchingHope said...

@Laura: Haha... Oh my goodness. I don't think I dressed up for halloween until I was like, 13. I wish I had been dressed up as a pumpkin though, that would be so cool.

@Rebecca: Hey! You did not write it at all. You spoke it. I wrote it. There is a difference ;{

@Falen: I'm scared of eating pumpkin seeds o_0

@Joan: Norway! Ahahaha... I hope there are pumpkin patches in Norway. You could always plant some, couldn't you? And then you can be the Crazy Pumpkin Lady that everyone loves.

@ElvishPummpkinHobbit: I am glad this person you speak of is in no way a gourd. That would be distressing.

Palindrome said...

MMMmmmm, pumpkins.

Why is it that every time I read your blog I go away hungry?!


btw, are you sending any sort of edible items in my winning bundle?
Pumpkins, perhaps??

If I open my package (tee-hee) and can't eat anything inside of it, I'm going to so ticked! Or I'll just eat the pillow. I will try and take a picture before that though.

I'm sorry for the late response. I'm so behind on my reading of blogs.

AchingHope said...

Because I've been really into food lately, which is mad weird because I never cared really about food before.

It's SO WEIRD that you should say that, because I was packing up your package and thinking: "I should put something edible in here." No lie! And then I didn't because I was room and the closest thing to edible I had in there was a cinnamon scented candle, and you would have to pry that out of my cold dead fingers.

Oh, and don't ever worry about late responses. I'm usually late myself, and besides, seeing extra little comments at the end always make me feel happy. Not that other comments don't... But... Ahem. I'm going to offend someone so I'm shutting up now.

Blam said...

Joan Crawford: I am Pumpkin-Crazy.

Oh, you crack me, adding the word "Pumpkin".

AchingHope: I'm scared of eating pumpkin seeds o_0

Pumpkin seeds is tasty. You lay them out on a cookie sheet, sprinkle them with salt, and bake them. As long as you don't forget the incantation that will prevent them from growing into whole pumpkins in your stomach, you'll be fine.

AchingHope: Oh, and don't ever worry about late responses. I'm usually late myself, and besides, seeing extra little comments at the end always make me feel happy.

Woo-hoo! Lookit me, here at the end!


I'm not at the end anymore, am I?

Blam said...

I am!

How 'bout now?

VW: bentry — Mr. Linus, standing guard.

AchingHope said...

@Blam: But you see, I can't find that incantation anywhere, so there's nothing stopping the pumpkins from rooting in my stomach.

bentry.... Ahahahaha....

And ha! Now you're not at the end anymore. Mwahahahahaha.... >:)

Blam said...


AchingHope said...

Pbbbbbbbbbbbbt *sounds of tongue being stuck out*